Rejection. A feeling I’m sure most of us can relate to. Ultimately I was rejected from all 4 medical schools that I had initially applied to, and had to settle for my backup UCAS choice despite achieving a decent set of A Level grades.
I know it sounds melodramatic, but just like that, I felt as though I had lost all purpose in life and was completely distraught. When you’ve worked so hard for something and dreamed about it for so long, you almost feel angry when you don’t get what you want and wonder why the universe hates you. It’s so easy to get completely carried away and fall into a vicious cycle of disappointment and ingratitude. It’s a huge knock to one’s confidence, and creates self-doubt that wasn’t there before. Whether it comes from a friend, family member, crush, job or university, the feeling of rejection is possibly one of THE WORST things anyone can experience, so I thought I would do a quick post with some tips on bouncing back from the severe soul-destroying blow that is rejection:
- Talk to people about how you’re feeling. 9 times out of 10, someone will have been through a similar experience and just voicing your emotions will make you feel tonnes better. Sometimes talking to people you know is too painful at first, so perhaps trying to reach out to forums and bloggers is often a nice way to get everything off your chest!
- Cry. If you want to. You may think I’m mad, and maybe I am, but genuinely, sometimes having a good old cry in the shower helps you to pour out all those bottled up feelings and just like that – you’re okay! Plus, no one can ever tell you’ve been crying if you do it in the shower, it’s a win win! I realise I’m totally sounding like a compulsive cryer now – moving on!
- Be grateful. We can all admit that we often fall into a pit of self-pity once we’ve experienced rejection. The Ben&Jerry’s comes out, Netflix comes on, and we don’t resurface for a questionable amount of time. Here’s a tip: every time you feel deflated about something, try and list 5 people anywhere in the world that are worse off than you. It forces us to wake up and appreciate what we DO have, and I know for a fact has helped me to be mindful of the people around me and adapt to certain situations with a lot more self-control than I did aged 18.
- Be proactive! This point is super important – every time I have felt rejected or down about a certain situation, I try to throw myself into other opportunities as soon as possible. Stay open-minded and believe that each of us has a place in this world – it’s just going to take some of us longer to find it than others, and that’s okay!
I have to say I have always been surrounded by people who help me to see the good in every situation, and who constantly encourage me to ‘go with the flow’ – and that’s why I ended up studying Biomedical Science at the University of Surrey, and having the best 4 years of my life so far.
And in the beautiful words of Alexander Graham Bell:
“When one door closes, another one opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
So put away the Ben&Jerry’s, turn off Netflix, get out of the house and jump at the next opportunity coming your way!
Okay. Maybe keep the Ben&Jerry’s out, one can never have too much ice cream!